THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness

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If you throw out pollution over there, it winds up in your lungs over here. Relationally, if one partner wins and the other loses, both lose—because the loser always makes the winner pay. It engenders resentment and hatred, which tend to show up in passive-aggressive behavior—withdrawal of generosity , of sexuality , of passion, and, ultimately, of love itself.

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Unless a partner is willing to risk the relationship, power imbalances can lead directly to affairs or the kind of exits that leave a powerful partner in head-scratching surprise. In order to sustain healthy intimacy you have to be willing to risk the relationship.

Choose Love Not Fear And Discover You ARE Love

Pick up your own dry cleaning. Much as power feeds grandiosity, the state of emotional disconnection that the powerful inhabit is awfully lonely. And therein lies trouble. More often, the powerful slip into outside relationships—and feel fully justified in doing so. The lonelier they feel, says Real, the more they blame their partner. That enables them to feel entitled to find someone else, either by leaving the relationship for a different a partner or by having affairs.

Subordinate partners are no strangers to loneliness , but the cascade of events may be slightly different, less an entitlement than a quest for attention. She begins a search elsewhere for friends, intellectual stimulation, and fun. Boundaries get crossed.

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  • Their partners may suddenly launch into hot pursuit to get them back into the marriage. Denying the dignity of one partner has consequences not only for relationship stability and happiness, but for health. Power, says Berkeley psychologist Dacher Keltner, has distinct biological correlates. The possession of power changes powerholders—usually in ways invisible to them—by triggering activation of the behavioral approach system, based in the left frontal cortex and fueled by the neurotransmitter dopamine.

    Nevertheless, it makes powerful people quick to act on appetites, to detect opportunities for material and social rewards such as food, money, attention, sex, and approval. They think about sex more and flirt more flagrantly. Politeness be damned, they act rudely, indulging their own whims.

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    The biological obverse marks the powerless. It also ushers in negative feelings, notably anxiety and depression, virtually hallmark emotions of those denied power. People lose power in different ways and at different times in the relationship. One of the consequences of powerlessness, says Keltner, is that the reigning fear narrows focus onto threats and makes the powerless keen observers of those who have power over them. They know them better than the powerful know themselves.

    Young couples today enter marriage expecting equality. Both partners assume they are going to be working, Schwartz reports. Men feel much more permission to be involved in the everyday lives of their children than their fathers did. Beginning during courting, they are likely to be sharing expenses. But ideology crashes into reality when children arrive. Then the necessity of allocating childcare responsibilities gives rise to power inequalities that surreptitiously erode a sense of self and decision-making power. As she loses power as an individual, her partner may exercise veto power in decision making or become cavalier about when to be home for dinner.

    How to LIVE the way of love

    Compounding the problem is income disparity. It tends to give men more decision-making power. Either way, the idea and reality of best friendship are corroded. Enter resentment and anger. Often, sex becomes an instrument for withholding or rewarding. But most of all, the once-equal partner now has a diminished sense of self—unless she brings an unusual array of personal resources into the relationship.

    They confer power precisely because they imply a person can function outside the relationship. Rather than rely on cultural assignment of gender roles, gay men and women must come up with their own ways to divide labor and share decisions. Having to actively decide who does what pulls for greater consciousness of fairness and equality, even after children arrive.

    Conflict discussions are most telling. Both gay men and lesbians are far more egalitarian than heterosexuals in resolving differences. Same-sex partners are less accusatory and deploy more humor in their disagreements. Same-sex couples show more affection, listen better, and take more turns talking. Their ability to influence each other keeps discussions positive.

    Each understands exactly what the other means. Nevertheless, Gottman concludes, heterosexual couples may have a great deal to learn from homosexual relationships. Equity is a greater concern in homosexual relationships—and partners behave in accordance with their concerns.

    And all relationships could benefit from recognizing that power and love, long cast as emotional matter and antimatter, are in fact convergent forces. In fact, when expressed separately, love and power degenerate, he argues.

    Deepak Chopra Quotes about love, happiness and life

    Lack of love turns power into unconstrained self-interest; lack of power makes love sentimental and romantic, demanding fusion and loss of selfhood. A healthy relationship is both two and one at the same time—love enables individual partners to become their full selves. And such growth provides them with the strength to maintain their oneness. Love enables power. Back Psychology Today.

    Our Path to Happiness, Health and Love – Ashmayu Yoga

    Back Find a Therapist. Back Get Help. Back Magazine. The Power of Boundaries Sharing personal information brings people closer together. Subscribe Issue Archive. Back Today.

    Gender Differences vs Gender Stereotypes. What will you choose? We have all met people who ration and dole out love and affection hesitantly basing them on preconditions and restrictions. But true love gets imprisoned and suffers a slow death when too many ego-based limits are placed on it. And moreover, love that measures every move and restricts us constantly does not really make us happy. As Hafiz so wonderfully puts it, when we release the tight and conditional restrictions on love, our love becomes like the warmth of the sun that kisses the earth never asking anything back in return.

    Do you see how you shine and glow in the presence of someone who loves you deeply? When we are loved deeply, our natural radiance shines through us and expresses itself. When you give your deep love to something or someone, you develop a great purpose and a great meaning to move towards your quest. What can you do if you do not find anyone who loves you deeply? I have found that in those trying moments, you need to love yourself deeply and radiate that love outwards to the world.

    Are you living and acting from a place of courage and love or are you acting from a place of fear and loss? Loss and failure are inevitable in life but do not allow them to dictate how to live your life. If you want to feel passion, enthusiasm and fascination for life, you may have to continually choose love and action in spite of the fear of failure and deep loss.

    And when his wings enfold you yield to him, though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.

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    When your sense of love overwhelms and soothes the pangs of fear and loss, you will be inspired to great action and craft a life of your deepest choosing. Are you rowing the boat of your life towards hope and love or are you floating untethered being jostled around at the fancy of fear and anticipated loss? Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love. They suffer not quite knowing what the problem is.

    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness
    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness
    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness
    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness
    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness
    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness
    THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness THE POWER OF LOVE Path to Love and Happiness

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